We live in an overpopulated world where the natural desire to have offspring overcomes the logical concern of lack of resources, the excess of children without parents, or simply the inability of some for parenthood.
For all these reasons, I did and did not want children,
and lived in a constant state of doubt and fright at the thought of procreating: had I not been convinced by the father of my daughter, I would have postponed indefinitely the idea of having a baby to end up dismissing it altogether, as happens to many women and men of my generation.
To my tremendous luck, from conviction to fact only a few months passed, and thank goodness, because the separation from the father did not wait either.
云, Yun, “cloud” in Chinese, is the name of my daughter. She is half Chinese, half Western, although the weakness of my genes shows how little she looks like me physically. Many think she’s adopted, a fantasy that makes me go with a higher head when she walks hand in hand with me.
In the few times in my life that I have suggested to have children, I proclaimed that I wanted one of each color, because I saw the future in the mix of races. Considering my age and my little desire to engender more (I seriously doubt anyone will convince me again), I think I’ll stick with the Asian.
And I say I don’t want more not because Yun is the most wonderful, intelligent and special daughter I could have dreamed of (to put it completely objective).
I don’t want more for the above reasons and because I adore my freedom and don’t want to postpone more years my emancipation as mother.
My sister belongs to that group of modern women who have no children. To the Spanish proverb “If god does not give you children, the devil will give you nephews” my sister says “Thank you, Devil.”
We are so close, that the most natural result has been to share maternity and education of our girl, who is growing with a surplus of mothers to the point of calling me “auntie” and her “mommy”, especially when we can bridge the gap and stick together like three happy limpets.
And because she is a great inspiration to us, we must devote an exclusive section, another hodgepodge of photos, videos, her witticism, stories for her, and, in construction process, the documentary “One Cloud, Two Worlds.”
